Woohoo! It seems that Kevin Smith is planning a sequel to the movie "Clerks"...

The sequel picks up 10 years later.

"It's about what happens when that lazy, 20-something malaise lasts into your 30s. Those dudes are kind of still mired, not in that same exact situation, but in a place where it's time to actually grow up and do something more than just sit around and dissect pop culture and talk about sex," Smith said during an interview at his Hollywood office. "It's: What happened to these dudes?"

Read the whole article...it seems that he is going to keep this a reasonably low-budget affair and he managed to sign on just about the entire original cast...so much for his promise to never make another film with Jay and Silent Bob in it!

A nice informative list of 12 techniques for causing yourself testicular pain. Just FYI for the vast number of men who take great pleasure in having great testicular pain inflicted upon them...freaks that they are!

Need a good laugh? Take a look at "Top 10 Most Ridiculous Black Metal Pics of All Time" and chuckle away at the absurd posturing and ridiculous costumes that are presented in a feeble and retarded attempt at looking eeeeeevil!! Immortal takes the number two spot with this pic, and for good reason. LOOK AT THOSE FUCKING SHIN GUARDS! Since when did Satan have his own ice hockey team? Horgh wins #2 for the evil goalie look. But that's not all. What about Abbath's weapon!? What the fuck is that? It looks more like the Bat Signal than an axe. I just don't know what to think actually. Last, but not least, is Iscariah. The leather pants. The chainmail. The belt that turns said chainmail into a skirt. Ask Jonny, but I think Bennett developed that look in Commando. The only reason why this photo didn't make #1 is because of the lack of taxidermy. Frankly, I assume that when I go to hell this is what what all the flamingly homosexual transvestites will be forced to dress as to punish them for their transgressions...

Well, I thought someone I know was doing pretty good by winning a bunch of appeals with a previous employer over receiving unemployment benefits...but he could learn a thing or three from this guy...

...a tribunal awarded him €3,000 and three months' salary and said the pub had been his 'dream' job. The man also told the tribunal losing his job had been devastating.

What did he do wrong? It seems that this German waiter, my new personal hero, had been warned about drinking on the job and yet continued to consume up to 100 bottles of beer per day on the job!! My hat is off to that man, especially since he worked there for 8 years...

...and, really, the hell with the court win...do you realize how much 100 free bottles of beer a day alone would help out the bottom line in my finances?

Modern Drunkard, which we blog frequently and assume is on every 3bruces reader's favorites list, has a great article up on drinking alone. The next time you get loaded with the gang, gaze into your drink, your secret mirror, and think: “Hey, old friend. Remember our quiet time together? Remember the thoughts we shared? We’ll meet up again down the road. Just you, me, and the bottle.” Entitled "The Zen of Drinking Alone: Using Alcohol to Find Your Inner Monkey" it is an oddly compelling treatise on why you should drink alone sometimes...

The United States Postal Service has some great information up on their site...especially if you need to know how to ship a hippo. No kidding.

You probably seen those annoying little games where you have to maneuver your cursor through a maze without touching the sides, right? Well the mazes in this game are pretty easy...or would be if your cursor wasn't invisible.

If you thought those other games drove you nuts, you ain't seen nothin' yet!

I won't even attempt to explain how the above bumper sticker came into existence, you really just have to read it for yourself.

Mary-Kate Olsen's Crack-Man is the funniest game I've seen in a long time...enjoy!

Not to be outdone by their Palestinian mentors, terrorist rabbits now seek to oust an imperialist cricket club which has annexed their field... Members of Devizes cricket club in Wiltshire, western England, were burning dead branches when a rabbit caught up in the waste sped burning from the flames spreading a fire which destroyed lawnmowers and tools worth $110,000. "After it had been going 5 minutes, the rabbit shot out of the bonfire on fire and went into the hut which is our equipment store," club chairman John Bedbrook told Reuters. Two fire engines were called to extinguish the blaze. The rabbit's skeleton was discovered in the charred hut.

One of the better news items I've seen recently...

Suffolk police say they tried to pull over 32-year-old Yasyn Abdul Mattin, of Smithtown, on North Ocean Avenue after he was driving erratically. But cops say he didn't stop and ended up busting through a chain link fence and into the back yard of a house on Clio Place, right into a pond.

Then police say as his car was sinking Abdul Mattin refused to get out and began to light a crack pipe. He didn’t climb out of the car until the water level reached his chin.

Abdul will probably spend his jail term trying to perfect the "SCUCSA" (Self-contained underwater crack smoking apparatus) to prevent future embarrassments such as this...but, damn, I hope COPS has video of this!

Christ in heaven, my EYES!!! Auuugghhh!!! Whatever you do, do NOT view the video linked here!!

It is not safe for work, home, school, or anywhere else! You have been warned. Pardon me while I take a cheese grater to my eyeballs to rid the of the lasting impressions left behind by this horror...

Ogog Alive is a pretty amusing little Flash based game...give it a try.

Rescuers went in not knowing how difficult it would be to get her out. 40-year-old Gail Grinds was literally stuck to her couch and had to be removed surgically at the hospital.

I won't even attempt to describe this situation...go read.

If you haven't been tuning in to the "Ali G Show" on HBO you have been missing the most scathingly funny thing on TV in a long time. Take for example a character he does called Borat who is supposedly a reporter from Kazakstan. In the linked segment he has just finished interviewing country music legend Porter Wagoner to learn how to write a country song. He writes a song and then performs it in a club...with the crowd enthusiastically joining him for the chorus. Watch the video and your intial confusion will turn to gut splitting laughter and tears!! Guaranteed!

Unlike the reference made in the old skool techno/rave song "James Brown is Dead", it seems that Rick James *IS* dead, bitch!!!

Just a little advice for the people over at Porn Bread...for some reason I'm thinking a cheese filling is the wrong way to go when making vagina shaped danishes! Don't get me wrong, I love cheese danish but I'm thinking if you're shaping them like vaginas cherry is the way to go...

For the kinky do it yourself woman (or tranny) in your life, here are instructions for knitting an edible g-string out of licorice whips. Hmmm, licorice whip...I knew the net wouldn't let me down.

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