Easter is cancelled, sorry kids.

NUMBER FIVE this week: The Queen Mother

Bono Williams?

(via Goatee Style)

Good early Saturday morning t.v. - River's Edge

SPAM SPAM SPAM - Instead of wasting your time reading thru your SPAM, now you waste your time listening to it as well - Spamradio

You'd best "Watch Out Behind You Hunter!" This game is almost inexplicable. You're a hunter in the woods with a shotgun. While you're out there you will encounter naked men who chase you around and the object is to shoot them before they get to you. If they get to you, well, I did warn you to watch your behind!

Seeing as how most people have a few extra days off this weekend, you may want to head over to Romeo Design and putter around for a while. Flash games, flash movies and all kinds of good stuff. Sure, it's pretty slow over a dialup line but you've got some extra free time this weekend!

Rodney Dangerfield's 21 Best One Liners

Plane Crash - 4 escape injury as historic Boeing Stratoliner ditches in Elliott Bay near Seattle . . . Watch the video ... (thanks Lazarus)

John Wayne Bobbitt Remarries . . . Maybe he should read the Kamasutra story below...

Here's one for the comment board - The new translation of the Kamasutra reflects the original emphasis on a woman's pleasure and the importance of gratifying her.

Overweight People Crash Cars - Fat people are more likely to be killed or seriously injured in car accidents than thin ones, according to New Scientist magazine.

Number Three - Former Ozzy Osbourne/Motley Crue drummer Randy Castillo died Tuesday at the age of 41 (Thanks Lazarus) . . . and Number Four - Movie Giant Billy Wilder, 95, Dies - Oscar-winning filmmaker Billy Wilder directed such classics as Sunset Boulevard, Some Like It Hot and "Double Indemnity, has died. He was 95.

Speaking of High Voltage - Today is the 23rd anniversary of the Three Mile Island nuclear reactor accident

I noticed recently that the age-old question of "who is the third Bruce" has once again reared it's ugly head. My answer, and I'm sticking to it, is George P. Burdell of course!

Rev. Brian : Speaking of Bruces, the Authentic Indian Name Generator says I'm Bruce Honorary Radical which doesn't sound very indian to me.

Gentlemen, start your blenders? . . . Extreme Mix Machine

The Budget Traveller's Guide to Sleeping in Airports . . . My favorite quote - "Newark, New Jersey - This airport, located in the armpit of the U.S." . . . zzzzzz

I just saw on tv news that Milton Berle has died at age 93 . . . R.I.P. Uncle Miltie . . . I wonder who will be number three?

Family on Display - Harrods department store in London is looking for a family to spend a week living in its store windows under the gaze of the general public . . . Big Brother to the max.

Check out the trailer from the new Spider-Man Movie - In theaters May 3rd . . . Special effects look great. I hope it lives up to it's hype.

20 things You make twenty, err... things, send it to them and you get twenty, uhhh... things back. A great way to get alot of ummm....things!

ALCOHOL WARNING!!!

The new Cooper (BMW) Mini is finally available in the U.S.A.

When Good Softball Goes Bad - A 34-year-old Boca Raton man choked a 74-year-old umpire unconscious after a bad call.

StripClubList.com - An International Directory of Strip Clubs . . . I wonder if they have a Vindigo version for my Visor.

Absolutely the foulest thing I've seen in quite some time - the Rate My Poo site is just nauseating. Take a picture of your next #2 and send it in so that other netizens can examine your business. Inconceivable.

If you don't feel like rating at other people's messy toilets always remember you can vote for Reverend Brian and I over at "Am I a Terrorist or Not"

Why coulnd't they have someplace like the Ted Nugent Kamp for Kids when I was a young lad?

Anybody else who took the "What Calvin are You?" test the other day and came up being Spaceman Spiff like meself should head right on over to the Spaceman Spiff page. Spiff wallpaper, Spiff comix, a compendium of aliens Spiff has encountered and even Spiff games await you there. It's all part of one of the best Calvin and Hobbes sites on the net...

Above is a nifty alphabet which was generated using The Alphabet Synthesis Machine. Draw a simple starting glyph, then alter a number of parameters and keep doing so until you are satisfied with the results. When you are done it will generate a truetype font set for you to download. Absolutely pointless and useless - I only spent an hour or so screwing with it!

Peoplecards! Trade 'em with your friends! Normal Plain ol' people on Trading Cards. How can I get on one of these? Collect all six billion? A daunting task at best!

Playboy seeks Women of Enron . . . Gotta make a living somehow.

Hey, I was thinking about making a new logo for the combined blog



What do you guys think?

Did you guys catch The Colin Quinn Show last night on NBC? . . . Absolutely hysterical. I was laughing my ass off . . . Too bad NBC only gave him three episodes.

Nanny and the Professor . . . What ever happened to Kim Richards?

The reason why stick people are extinct...

My first post to 3Bruces . . . Farting Dog Harmonics . . . Run your mouse over the dogs a toot a happy tune.

Leave it to the French. Here is an English translation of a French webpage which claims that a bomb-laden truck and not a Boeing 747 was the cause of the damage at the Pentagon on 9/11. Their proof? Where's the wreckage?

Here ya go bozos. There is none. Well, at least, none you're going to use these pictures to ascertain. There are no large sections because the plane hit a solid object and disintegrated. Generally, when planes crash, they skip across the ground or water breaking into pieces and decelerating much slower. This was direct impact of a sort I doubt has ever been seen before, therefor we have nothing to compare it to. And, remember, this was not just any solid object, it was the military nerve center of a major superpower - let's just say that it was built to withstand severe conditions. Second, jet fuel burns VERY hot. Hot enough in fact to melt the aluminum of which the plane was almost entirely constructed. The fire burned for quite some time before it was brought under control and part of the building even collapsed on top of where the wreckage would have been. My opinion? Unchanged from day one. Damn, that is one stout building!

And then the biggest question: why cover it up? There would not have been much difference in public reaction between a truck bombing and a suicide airline impact - the Trade Center attacks pretty much stole the thunder there. So with no plausible reason in mind and none provided by these lunatics, what would the motivation be? We also have a missing airliner, it's crew and passengers to account for which they give no explaination. Gotta love the conspiracy theorists. They don't need any reasons, they just keep pulling the ideas from thin air.

One more before bed! Screw knowing your ascendent sign and all that astrology crap! What is really important is knowing your birth Playmate! If you can't figure out whether or not this is worksafe you should stay off the internet! Mirrored here - Thanks Laz

What is your Elven name? Unlike the usual silly questionaire name generators, this is a simple listing of names and their translations into Tolkien's Elvish language - with what appears to be a great deal of research involved.. It surprised me that some extremely common names were not included but hopefully yours is - the list IS quite complete. They correctly identified my name as being derived from Greek and meaning "to be watchful" - which translates into Elvish as Tirno meaning "watcher". Interestingly, I had no idea of the etymology of my mother's name but it is particulary Elvish, Calimetaure - meaning "bright wood". Pretty neat but I wasted quite a bit of time at this site tonight and must rise early...

Rate My Gasmask has to be the most comprehensive site for rating gasmask fetish pictures that I've ever seen. No really! I defy you to find a better one. This should be especially popular with any European readers now that it is rumored that 10 Euro banknotes are making men impotent!

'What are you talking about?!' Eunice frantically scrambled from the king-sized Craftmatic® adjustable bed, slipping a floor-length velvet housecoat over her ravishingly weathered naked frame, 'Husband my ass! I think I'd remember if I had a goddamned husband! Especially if he was a lousy lay colostomy bag-wearin' bastard like you!'

'Come back to bed,' said Harold. 'It's already 5 a.m. - we have to get the El Dorado to the Fort Lauderdale Meineke by 8:30.'

A short excerpt from "Alzeheimers Jezebel: She mates and forgets." I figured I'd give you a few days to recover from the Hot Skating Grandama before posting links to any more geriatric erotica!